four friday faves.

[1] The Jim Gaffigan Show on TV Land ... so so funny.
[2] Madewell ... I first heard of this clothing site/store a few months ago. After seeing so many rave reviews, I took advantage of their extra summer sale a couple of weeks ago to get a few new tops. Love love.
[3] "Be Strong" print from Jones Design Company ... just ordered this to hang in our family room near the front door.
[4] New Orleans ... we have a special trip planned next month, and I can't wait!

first 5.

I have been waiting for this app all summer ... never knowing when it would officially release. I just found out it launched today! You can read/watch more about it here, but basically you set your alarm through the app, and there's a 5-minute teaching on God's word. Proverbs 31 Ministries developed the app, and they are such a great ministry. [the founder even has ties to my hometown, which is fun.] The idea is to give God the first five minutes of our day ... before social media, emails, or sleepy-headed children distract us. I'm so excited!

our memory master :)

Love love this picture ... that smiley-face. :) Matthew is holding up the proof of earning the right to call himself a "memory master" for the very first time. Monday, April 20th, was a huge day.

I'll explain ... becoming a "memory master" is an accomplishment that can be earned at the end of each year @ Classical Conversations. However, it's completely optional, and this was Matthew's first year going for it. I had always heard from others how tough it can be preparing & studying, but I really had no idea until we started. We had about 2-3 weeks of me drilling the year's memory work for hours and hours ... six different subjects, 24 weeks of material. [things like: states + capitals & where they are on the map; John 1:1-7 in English & Latin; US presidents in order; the entire timeline from Creation to September 11th; etc.] Anyway, our system was to study/drill for an hour, and then he could play Wii for a break. We did that over and over those weeks leading up to his test date.

I'll never forget the weekend before his big test on Monday. I started coming down with a cold, and we still had a lot of drilling to do. Regardless of how I felt, our time was running out. I was so stressed, and Matthew was running out of steam. After he had check marks for every bit of the material [looking like the paper he's holding above], it was time to give him a practice test.  At this point, he was merely hours from the real test. I could not believe it. Matthew had completely regressed and was getting so many questions wrong! Thankfully, I had no energy to push him because that would not have been the right decision. He was exhausted and mentally fried, so he went on to bed ... and I was a mess. I felt so sick, and was an emotional wreck as a result. This test was pass-fail. Either he answered every single question correctly, or he didn't. It wasn't looking like he was going to get memory masters, and I was terrified of setting him up for failure. So just before bed, I emailed his tutor [who would be administering the test] explaining everything ... my cold/breakdown, his exhaustion and lack of remembering the material, etc. To my surprise, she emailed back saying everything we were experiencing was so normal. She said every child has a time of not remembering anything, and you doubt if he/she is truly ready. She was not letting him or me off the hook. Truthfully, that had been my secret hope in emailing her. I felt like so much was going against us.

His test was at 10 a.m. that Monday morning, we reviewed as much as possible over breakfast, we were running late [no shock there], Hollis was barefoot with pajamas still on, I wanted to cry all the way to Tallahassee, and a nasty thunderstorm was approaching. But here's the good in it all ... a wise friend texted me that morning reminding me of all Matthew learned from our preparation, and that memory masters or no memory masters, there was reason for celebration. I needed my eyes opened to that, which in turn resulted in me telling Matthew on the way there that no matter what, Gus and I were extremely proud of him. I prayed so much on that drive that I truly would be content with whatever happened. I knew how hard he worked, and I wanted him to achieve memory masters so bad. When we arrived, the five of us raced out of the suburban, huddled in a quick prayer for Matthew at the door of the building, and then scurried inside knowing the storm was about to hit. What a morning!

It was the longest two hours waiting on him to finish the test [oral, by the way]. His face when he and his tutor walked in the room was priceless. HE DID IT!!! It was most thrilling seeing how great he felt about his accomplishment. It was written all over his face. :)

father's day.

Beyond blessed to have these great men in our life ... in my life. :) I'm very grateful for the love they share, the examples they are, and the fun we all have together.

four friday faves.

Since parenting is the toughest job, I have read many books on the subject over the last several years. I wouldn't call any of them perfect, but they are all based on scripture, so there are many valuable things I've learned from each one. Here are three of my favorites, and one that will arrive in the mail tomorrow. :)

[1] Give Them Grace ... This one teaches that raising "good" kids completely misses the mark; teaching our kids the gospel and grace of God is what matters the most.
[2] The Heart of Anger ... I don't love this cover, and I'm not even half-way through it yet, but this is such a great book. Whether or not you think anger is a real issue in your home, this has been very eye-opening. It dissects the Bible verse - "Fathers do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." [Ephesians 4:6] There are so many ways I never knew I have provoked our children to anger. Highly recommend.
[3] Shepherding a Child's Heart ... It has been a long time since I've read this one, but it's really good. It gives Biblical approaches to training up our children. I want/need to re-read it!
[4] The Ministry of Motherhood ... A good friend just recommended this one, and after reading this synopsis, I ordered it immediately. "A mother’s day is packed with a multitude of tasks that require energy and time: preparing meals, washing clothes, straightening and cleaning the house, and caring for children. These jobs all are necessary and crucially important. But in the dailyness of providing for a child’s physical, emotional, and social needs, vital opportunities for spiritual nurture and training can be overlooked. This doesn’t have to be the case. You can focus your energy on what matters most."

four friday faves.

So Hudson turned 7 on Wednesday, which is just crazy. Although his personality hasn't changed much [hooray!] since this video was filmed, he seems so grown up compared to his four year-old self!

Here are just a few of the ways God made him that I just adore ...
[1] He is the cutest rough & tough ball of energy, yet just as equally tender-hearted.
[2] His expressions, made-up phrases, and motions can be absolutely hysterical.
[3] He thinks to pray for people and situations more than I do.
[4] His smile ... lights up the world.

four friday faves.

Being that it is Good Friday, here are some things we will be incorporating in some way this weekend. Every year, my goal is to be more intentional than ever before ... with myself and with our children. It's easy to get wrapped up in egg hunts and candy [and we definitely love for our kids to enjoy them too], but we want the emphasis to be on Christ.

But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. [Romans 5:8]

[1] The Jesus Storybook Bible ... Nothing can replace the Bible, but this is good for in addition to. The illustrations are beautiful + captivating.
[2] Resurrection Eggs ... The kids love when we get these out each year. Such a great tangible way to teach the events of Easter.
[3] "He Has Risen!" Donuts ... So excited to try this for the first time on Sunday! We've made the resurrection rolls before, but I was looking for something with little to no prep time. :)
[4] One of my favorite worship songs ... "In Christ Alone".

His ways.

This is a pretty serious post for a Saturday, but it's one I knew I would write eventually. A few days before Valentine's Day, we [meaning myself, our family, our CC group] were hit with a tragedy we did not see coming. In a matter of only hours, we went from praying continuously for the health of a fellow CC mom to utterly heartbroken that she didn't make it. Here's the story...

Leah [pronounced lay-a] was one of the moms in Matthew's class @ CC. Her sons Elijah & Joshua are part of the all-boy class. Even though we saw each other and spoke every week, I didn't know Leah in the way that many others at CC did ... I spend most of my time in Hudson's class, mainly only joining Matthew's class to watch his presentations each week. So, Leah and I didn't interact a lot. My biggest interaction with her was at Earth Fare two years ago. It was my first trip to Earth Fare, I had all the kids, and it was pure mayhem! Each of the boys had a mini cart, which constantly tempted them to want to race them through the store, Eli threw up in the produce section, and I was about to lose my mind. :) Times like that always make me feel like there are judgmental eyes surrounding me. Then I saw Leah. She was new to CC at the time, so we introduced ourselves, and I vividly remember that interaction. At first I wasn't thrilled to see a familiar face with all the chaos around me, but I immediately felt at ease with Leah. She "got it," I could tell she wasn't judging me, and she was so pleasant to speak with. It was the calm I needed that crazy afternoon in Earth Fare.

Fast forward to Monday, February 9th. I was sitting in Matthew's afternoon writing class at CC, and one of my friends read a Facebook post about Leah needing prayers regarding kidney failure. She had just given birth to their third child, daughter Zivah, only 4 days prior. It was shocking. We knew it was serious, so several of us left the classroom and prayed together. By 7 o'clock that night, we had gotten word that Leah's heart had stopped, and that doctors weren't certain she would make it through the night. I know countless prayers pleading with God to save her were heard by our Creator that day and into the wee hours of the night. It was literally devastating to find out the next morning that Leah had died. Knowing how sad I was, I couldn't fathom what it was like for her family and friends ... for her husband, Dan, and those sweet boys ... and that baby who barely met her mommy.

Talk about a giant faith-tester. I had so many thoughts and emotions, all stemming from one central question: "Why didn't God save Leah?" As a mom, this is/was so hard to swallow. It's personally one of my biggest fears. However, over and over God brought to my mind two verses that brought comfort and encouragement and a bit of understanding:

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither 

are your ways my ways, declares the Lord." [Isaiah 55:8]

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together

for good, for those who are called according to his purpose." [Romans 8:28]

My faith was tested and thankfully strengthened as a result ... More than ever, I believe and know that God's ways are eternally minded. That's all that truly matters in life. If just one person comes into relationship with Jesus because of Leah's death, I know God's purpose was just that. I also know that Leah loved God, and was fulfilling His calling on her life here on earth. Therefore, God's promise in Romans to work "good" out of this devastation will hold true. Amid the deep, deep sadness felt by those who love Leah or those of us whose heart just breaks for them, these verses offer hope.

One of the most profound things I heard said that week was this: "Let us not mourn for where she isn't, but rejoice for where she is." As difficult as that may sound, that is the reality for those who love Jesus.

In conclusion, this song was played at Leah's service. So fitting.

twenty-fifteen.

I love it when the calendar rolls to a new year ... I love a fresh start; a new day; a chance to make some changes ... So I love coming up with some goals to strive for.

#1 Read more. I read some great books in 2014, but I also have books that are waiting to be picked up off our bookshelf ... Kisses From Katie by Katie Davis, Unbroken by Laura Hillenbrand, and Gifted Hands by Ben Carson are just a few on my reading list this year. I also want to read more to the kids. We go in and out of phases where I read aloud to them. We all love it, and I want to make that more of a habit around here.
#2 Serve more. I want to have eyes that are open and a heart this is willing to serve others this year in ways I never have before - whether in big or small ways ... and I want to teach our children to do the same, leading by example.
#3 Prioritize more. I am guilty of letting whatever I mark off my chalkboard wall to-do list determine how I measure my daily success. Working hard, managing a home, and providing clean clothes for my family are certainly very important, but I don't want to ever communicate to my family that my to-do list is more important than them. Instead, I want to go to bed each night knowing that in some way I showed Gus and the kids that they are such a treasure to me.
#4 Run more. I really love to exercise, and going for a run has been my very favorite. But after falling twice last year, I cut back for fear of falling again. I want to get over that fear, and run some races as well this year ... including a 10K.
#5 Listen more. This one is really hard for me when it comes to Gus and the kids. I'm not good at turning off my brain or putting my phone down when they want to tell me something. And I like to think I'm pretty good at pretending I'm listening when I'm actually thinking about something else. Truth is, I need to be listening to them ... I need to hear  Gus and the kids need to know I care about what they have to say, no matter if I'm really interested or not.

So these aren't necessarily my "new years resolutions" that tend to be broken by mid-January. It's about baby steps to changing some things about myself or making time for the most important in life. Thank goodness "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." [Matthew 19:26]

four friday faves.

[1] Fixer Upper on HGTV ... I've had 3 friends tell me about this show over the past few months, and I finally caught a marathon of it this week. Looovve it. Totally solidified my desire for acreage + a farmhouse.
[2] Tone It Up website ... I discovered these trainers about a year ago, and love their effective [and free!] workouts, as well as nutrition tips. I especially love how they post a weekly workout schedule every Sunday to keep things interesting + fun.
[3] It's All Good cookbook by Gwyneth Paltrow ... Gus gave me this for Christmas last year, and I love how it educated me on "clean eating." It's a good time of year to pull this one out again. Plus, every recipe I've tried has been delicious.
[4] Henderson Park Inn in Destin, Fla. ... sooo hope we will go back for our 13th anniversary next month :)

four friday faves.

[1] Gift cards ... I always love receiving these for Christmas, always.
[2] The state of our family room at the moment ... normally this would cause my head to spin, but not this time of year :) Right now it represents fun times with our favorite little people.
[3] Joules "field welly" rain boots ... Since we had a crazy amount of rain the three days before Christmas, I've been thinking how I really need to replace my current boots that have holes in them.
[4] Christmas Eve service ... Growing up, we spent half our Christmases in Atlanta with my Mom's side of the family. I love the memories of going to my aunt & uncle's church for their Christmas Eve service. Since our church doesn't have a service, we went to St. Peter's Anglican church in Tallahassee this Christmas Eve. I loved it. I loved the formality, the songs, the sermon, and my favorite ... the entire congregation singing Silent Night by candlelight on our knees.

thankful.

I love Thanksgiving. I love our traditions ... the boys and Gus going camping every Thanksgiving Eve with Daddy Nick & others on the family farm; taking Hollis to Mom & Dad's to have our own slumber party; having Thanksgiving lunch with my side of the family at Mom & Dad's eating the famous turkey, gravy and dressing that Grandma [my mom's mom] always cooked growing up; going home for quick naps & heading to the farm to be with Gus' side of the family for the remainder of the day ... that's how we always spend Thanksgiving, and I love every minute of it. 

As much as I look forward to our family traditions, I appreciate this day just as much for forcing me to ponder all that I have to be grateful for ... to be intentional in my thanksgiving. Here are just a few things I am thanking my Creator for today:

1. my husband who makes me laugh all the time

2. our healthy and happy children

3. grandparents who adore their grandchildren

4. family & friends who bless our lives more than they know

5. for being born in the United States of America

6. heat & hot water

7. clear nights when the sky is filled with stars

8. seeing excitement on the faces of our kids

9. Sunday naps

10. coffee & dark chocolate [not together though!]

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!

"Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; 

give thanks to him and praise his name." [Psalm 100:4]

inspired.

I'm a major fan of E! News. I know a lot of it is unimportant celebrity news, but I enjoy it when I can. It's just a nice little break from "real" news I guess. Anyway, several weeks ago Giuliana Rancic [love her] casually mentioned something about Jason Kennedy [another E! News journalist] and his faith. I had to google him, of course. I found out he's a fellow Floridian & is engaged to a girl named Lauren Scruggs who was in a horrific accident almost 3 years ago... this really intrigued me, so I dug deeper. I was stunned as I read several articles about how she stepped into a plane propeller & lost her left hand + eye. Apparently the accident caught national attention, but I hadn't heard about it. So, I bought her book: Still Lolo. I could have easily read it in a day if I had the time. It's that good. Her determination, her beauty, and her trust in Jesus through her darkest days inspires me more than I could ever articulate. Even more inspiring, it's a story of the enormous power of God.

no mistake.

The other night we had an @ home date night with a movie & my favorite super healthy dinner... chips, velveeta & rotel :) I kept hearing how funny this movie was, so I had been looking forward to renting it. It was really funny, but it caught me by surprise big time. I was not expecting it to hit home as much as it did. But then again, it was perfect timing with how I had been feeling the week before.

I'll rewind a bit ... that week was a great week in a lot of ways. Our first days of school went really well. The kids worked hard and we enjoyed some new ways of learning that I had fun planning out. Regardless, my week had some major challenges as well ... when the boys would not listen to me no matter how loudly I yelled to override their unbelievable focus on making each other laugh instead of paying attention to my instruction; when I felt like every 60 seconds someone needed something... and I was not in the mood to be interrupted; when it seemed like someone was either whining, crying, yelling or all three every 5 minutes ... it was pretty rough at times.

What I just described can be the norm on any given day in any household with children. I get that. But the hardest part for me was how defeated I felt & all the thoughts that were going through my head... how incapable I felt to be the mother of these little people... what was God thinking putting me in charge of these 4 when I am clearly not being the mother they need me to be, much less the mother I really desire to be? I've certainly had bad days just like any other mom, but this took the cake.

So fast forward a few days to our date night... I was really looking forward to a simple night - a comedy & some good dip. I had no idea I was in for something "deep" instead. I related to the main character, Ally, pretty much immediately. She struggled so much because she knew she was living out her dream [when I was a little girl, all I ever dreamed about was being a wife & mom too], yet couldn't understand why she felt the way she did. By the end of the movie I was in tears because of this quote said to her from a tough guy with a huge heart played by Trace Adkins: "I doubt the good Lord made a mistake giving your kiddos the mom he did." I'm sure this sounds pretty crazy to some, but I know God used that movie to encourage me - I needed to hear those words.

The truth is I do not have what it takes to be the mom I desire to be. I'm way too selfish, impatient & unkind @ times ... and I lack self-control much more then I would love to admit. Just like with most good movies though, thankfully there is a happy ending here. When [keyword] I focus my eyes on the only One who can supply my needs, my days look much different. There may still be rowdy, whiny & disobedient children all around me, but I'm not consumed by it. The change isn't them... it's ME.
"Seek the Lord and his strength. Seek his presence continually." [Psalm 105:4]
"Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart." [Psalm 37:4]

thirteen years ago...

I was 23 years old... driving on I-10 on my way back home to Quincy from seeing Gus in Jacksonville. I heard the news on the radio long before I was able to see any footage on TV. I remember once I finally got back home all I did was either watch the news or talk on the phone about what had happened until I fell asleep that night. What a day.

The personal element of 9/11 for me was that my parents were in Washington D.C. when everything happened. I remember telling Mom & Dad I wanted them to come home now... check out of their hotel and figure out a way to drive home NOW. Like that was possible. The one thing Dad told me that day to encourage me was that they were in the safest city in the United States at that point. He was right. Protection over our great country's capital had come in at full force.

One of my favorite images from that day [doesn't seem right to call it "favorite"] is the footage of President George W. Bush finding out the unbelievably tragic news as he was reading to some school children in Florida. I can't imagine what that was like for him to have to keep his composure for the sake of those children. He handled it beautifully.

Back to yesterday... We told the boys a little bit about the significance of the day & had some craft time in honor of September 11th, 2001.

Even though 9/11 is such a tragic day for our country and

there is so much evil in the world, this verse encourages me...

"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world." John 16:33